Ok so I've come to the conclusion that I understand very little about me. Hehehe.
Since Sunday when I became aware of what was going on in the vaguest way ever, I have had some difficult feelings about it.
I've felt distant from you. Which I understand given the circumstances. I know you're doing the right thing and I don't want you to give up on it.
But it has been a difficult few days for me really. And I hate to remember how difficult it is for you right now, from my own experience. But I do realise how tough it is. I really do.
I know you're probably in a place where you feel that nobody can reaaaally understand what you're going through or feeling. But I do.
But you seemed more like you yesterday like I said. You just seemed like you where previously, since Sunday you hadn't seemed like you at all. Or atleast there was something stopping me from feeling close to you.
But I guess you seem like you now, which has brought my feelings for you I suppose out of 'hibernation'.
I had been troubled by my own feelings prior to this. They had made me scared. Because before all this, when I thought of you or cuddling you or just being in your company I always got this nice feeling inside me about it. Often shouldering on naughty feelings. Hehe.
But the last few days when I thought of cuddles or kissing you or whatever, I knew I wanted to do it again but didn't have that feeling inside me.
That worried me. But last night I laid in bed and thought about it and that nice feeling came back. The slight dizzyness the thought of you brings. The excitement of knowing you.
I'm sorry if I wasn't supportive in those few days. I should have been moreso.
You've no need to kidnap my teddy bear in order to see me when it's all been sorted out. All you have to do is ask. I'll be there with open arms, and Pearson tea.
I like thinking of you again. Thankyou.
Pearson.x
